What does it mean to follow Jesus?
That question is worth answering carefully, because we follow all sorts of things. Some follow the news religiously, observing but not participating. Some follow the stock market, making informed bets. Some follow a sports team, jumping on the bandwagon when things are good. Is that how we follow Jesus?
Jesus is unflinching about what following Him involves. He raises the bar no higher than He intended, but also not lower. It’s better to be uncomfortable than uninformed about the cost. Especially given the alternative He spelled out:
“Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’” (Matthew 7:22–23)
No one wants to hear that line. So let’s see how Jesus answers the question in Matthew 16.
“When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, ‘Who do people say the Son of Man is?’ They replied, ‘Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.’ ‘But what about you?’ he asked. ‘Who do you say I am?’” (Matthew 16:13–15)
That question is the question. Your opinion of Jesus doesn’t change who He is, but it changes you.
Jesus refers to Himself here as the Son of Man. Christians believe He’s the Son of God, so why this title? Both are true. Jesus is fully God, coequal and coeternal with the Father. The “God-ness” of Jesus is the line that separates Christianity from every other religion that incorporates Jesus to some degree.
Why does it matter whether Jesus is fully God? Because of what’s at stake.
People mess up. We do things, think things, and say things we wouldn’t be proud of, that hurt us, hurt others, and reveal we’re not living God’s way. The Bible calls that sin: the rejection of God’s authority. Sin separates us from God. How would you bridge that separation?
Virtually every other world religion answers the same way: behave. Earn it. Christianity says the opposite. You can’t. Only God can. And He did. The cross is how.
Imagine someone has hurt you deeply, lied to you, and betrayed you. Reconciliation requires somebody to absorb the pain. They can apologize and clean up their behaviour, but you still have to choose to forgive.
That’s a picture of God and us. Sin is real. The breach is real. Only God can repair it. Jesus, being fully God, chooses to absorb the cost. On the cross, He paid it. “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God” (2 Corinthians 5:21). Only Jesus, as fully God, could offer a sacrifice of infinite worth, capable of covering the sins of all humans across all time. If Jesus were only a man, He’d be part of the problem, not the solution.
But Jesus also calls Himself Son of Man. That title points back to a vision in Daniel: “There before me was one like a son of man, coming with the clouds of heaven … He was given authority, glory and sovereign power; all nations and peoples of every language worshipped him” (Daniel 7:13–14). The Son of Man is a human-like royal figure with divine authority, worthy of worship.
Jesus is fully God and fully human. Christians call this the hypostatic union, the union of two natures (divine and human) without division. Why does His humanity matter? Because His humanity allows Him to identify with us completely. He experienced hunger, joy, sorrow, temptation, even death. “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are, yet he did not sin” (Hebrews 4:15).
Imagine two friends, Adam and Bill, who’ve fallen out. Both are convinced the other is at fault. The relationship needs a mediator who knows and identifies with both perfectly. Who can mediate between God and us? Only the One who identifies with both. Jesus. “For there is one God and one mediator between God and humanity, the man Christ Jesus” (1 Timothy 2:5). Jesus knows you completely because He became fully human. Jesus knows God completely because He has always been God.
Back to the question.
“Simon Peter answered, ‘You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.’ Jesus replied, ‘Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by flesh and blood, but by my Father in heaven.’” (Matthew 16:16–17)
Peter’s answer marks a turn in Jesus’ ministry. Once you realize who Jesus is, everything changes:
“From that time on Jesus began to explain to his disciples that he must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things at the hands of the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and on the third day be raised to life. Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. ‘Never, Lord!’ he said. ‘This shall never happen to you! Jesus turned and said to Peter, ‘Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.” (Matthew 16:21–22)
How quickly things turn for Peter. A few verses earlier, Jesus calls him blessed. Now he’s getting one of the sternest rebukes in Scripture. The last person Jesus said, “ Get behind me, Satan, “ was Satan himself, in the wilderness, when Satan tried to get Jesus to claim greatness without the cross. Now the same temptation comes through Peter, who cannot imagine that the path to greatness runs through death.
This exchange produces the clearest definition of discipleship in the Bible:
“Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?’” (Matthew 16:24–26)
There it is. Deny yourself, take up your cross, follow me. Those are the conditions.
Deny yourself. That’s not easy. Underneath everything else we follow, we all follow the same thing: ourselves. We do what we want. The natural pull of every human heart is to run our lives our own way, because we believe that’s where happiness lives. Denying yourself goes against the deepest instinct in you. Jesus says that’s exactly the point. Following Him won’t work any other way.
Take up your cross. This phrase has been worn smooth into a bumper sticker, used to describe a thankless job or being a Calgary Flames fan. That isn’t what Jesus meant. Carrying your cross came from the Roman practice of crucifixion: condemned criminals were forced to carry their cross beam to the execution site. To carry your cross was the symbol of a person completely conquered.
So Jesus is saying the only way it works is if you consider yourself completely conquered by Him.
Plenty of people follow Jesus but wouldn’t call it the best decision they’ve ever made, just one of many. Usually that’s because they aren’t completely conquered. They’re trying to share leadership of their lives. That arrangement will not work.
Try following two songs at the same time. Phil Collins’ In the Air Tonight and the Beatles’ Help!, both at full volume. It’s miserable. You can’t understand either song. The only way to actually hear one is to silence the other.
A lot of us are trying to follow two songs.
Your heart is divided. You want God’s forgiveness, but you won’t kill the unforgiveness toward your parents, your ex, or the person who hurt you.
Your finances are divided. You want to be generous and trust God to provide, but you also want complete control.
Your emotions are divided. You crave the peace of being conquered by Jesus, but you won’t surrender your bitterness, jealousy, and anger.
Your mind is divided. You want sexual purity and freedom, but you won’t admit the addiction, won’t get help, won’t change your habits.
To follow Jesus, you have to kill whatever competes with Him.
How? You make a decision. Jesus didn’t overspiritualize it. He was painfully practical:
“Whoever does not carry their cross and follow me cannot be my disciple. Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it?” (Luke 14:27–28)
Count the cost. There’s no fine print. Following me will cost you you.
No one can deny you for you. No one can pick up your cross for you. You have to do it voluntarily, just as Jesus did.
The bar is high. The reward is greater. Jesus says, “Whoever loses their life for me will find it” (Matthew 16:25).
Here’s the thing: you’re going to lose your life no matter what. The question is what you lose it to.
You can lose your life trying to save it on your own terms, organizing your existence around the things you think will finally make you happy, chasing satisfaction without ever catching it. Many people spend their lives that way, losing their life to a lie.
You can lose your life saying, I’m fine running things my way. Fair enough. But a day comes when life ends, and everything you accumulated is lost to the grave.
Or you can lose your life to Jesus. Live completely conquered by Him, and He promises that in doing so, you finally find what you’ve been looking for. You exchange your life for eternal life.
Don’t waste a life with one foot in and one foot out, trying to follow two things at the same time. Don’t waste a life disappointed and miserable while clinging to the steering wheel. Don’t waste a life chasing things only Jesus can give.
The cost of following Jesus is real. So is the reward. Now that the terms are on the table, the only thing left is the decision: who are you going to follow?